the more things change…
talking to a dear friend today, I mentioned that I felt my life changing very quickly, and that I felt I was attempting to mold my personality around these new changes. Let me make that more specific – I feel like a chameleon who anticipates moving from a green branch to a red one. Any self-respecting chameleon will look at itself and say, well, I’d better start planning that switch.
College is ending for me in two weeks. In a way, it’s already ended – I have found the next stage, and have begun to do what I do best: adapt. It’s scary, because I feel it’s been too smooth. I know that at some point, I’m going to look back at this part of my life and… and I don’t know. Perhaps sometime in July, after all the dust has settled from the excitement and flurry of my new life, I’ll suddenly have a nervous breakdown. Because while I’m just treating this move like the next thing, really it’s more like The Next Thing, in terms of it’s monumentalism. It’s not summer vacation. It’s my life.
I’m worried that I feel so ready for it. There’s no way I am actually ready for it, so I must be faking out, going along with it until I figure out the tricks, right?
I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop, as they say. As I watch myself from the outside, I want to ask everyone around me, how can you be fooled?
k.
squashed.
I’ve been playing solo squash for the past few weeks, every few days for at least 45 minutes. The sight of the squash court, that first thud of the ball, is both exhilirating and exhausting. Sometimes, I get into a rhythm and I don’t even realize that time has passed – I think about other things while repeatedly slamming the little rotten plum of a ball against that wall. My backhand is getting effortless.
Today I wrote the first paragraph of a new short story in my mind. Today, I volleyed ten successive smacks without a bounce. Then I whooped with excitement over such a feat.
I think I have a new addiction.
Anyone else know what I mean?
cheers,
k.
Astoria, Here We Come!
Well, well well. More good news, a week’s date from the last good news. Genie and I went to Astoria last night with the realtor (John – he rocks.) and we found ourselves a cozy little nest for future living fun. It’s huge, airy, old and full of cute little touches, and inexpensive, in a wonderful neighborhood that’s charming and quirky.
Essentially, our dream apartment.
AND it’s STILL erin’s birthday! Plenty of things to celebrate!
What’s your good news! Don’t forget to post a birthday cheer for Erin!
Love,
K.
2,4,6,8 Who do we here at PetitHiboux think is really great? ERIN!
It’s Erin’s 21st birthday everyone! I just think Erin is the cat’s meow. She’s the best friend one could hope for, she’s funny, she’ll tell you the truth and make you laugh and get you stoned when the situation calls for it. She scratches my back and I scratch hers – she’s the olive in my martini, she’s the string in my bikini, she’s the bun around my weenie… okay, now I’m just trying to rhyme.
My point with all this is – leave her a happy happy birthday on the comment section even if you’ve never met her, because she’s my dearest little Eeyore and I want her to be happy today.
Kisses all! maybe exciting news about future digs coming soon – watch this space.
K
