Walking to the subway this morning, I saw a guy wearing a teeshirt that said “A Watched Pot Never Boils”. Stare at that last sentence with me, imagine it on a teeshirt, and then insert whatever version of “what the fuck?” is appropriate to your language/culture/generation.
I kept walking down the street wondering who in god’s name had actually produced that tee shirt. But then I thought about how much I hate all those uselessly unfunny and yet meant to be ironic teeshirts at Urban Outfitters, you know the ones that say things like “Hugs Not Drugs” or “C is for Crunk” (basically if you’re someone that owns a teeshirt that says something like that you really need to consider putting this blog down and backing away slowly).
So if I hate all those teeshirts (and I do, oh my god how I do, although I make the exception for the “You Say tomato, I say Fuck You” teeshirt), I can’t possibly hate a teeshirt that veers in exactly the opposite direction of quoting useless and unrelated, unironic aphorisms like “A Watched Pot Never Boils”. And, really, there are so many good idioms and expressions that have yet to be put on teeshirts. Like, “There’s more than one way to skin a cat”, or “Spare the Rod, Spoil the Child”, and even, “A Leopard Cannot Change His Spots” or “Don’t Shit Where You Eat”.
Actually, I really want a teeshirt that says, “Live by the Sword, Die by the Sword”. And by “sword”, I mean, “sarcasm” and “vodka”. I would be so unironic about wearing that shit, you don’t even KNOW.
what’s your stance on my “Very Kissable”/”Very Huggable” tshirt? It really serves no purpose other than a statement of fact. It’d be like having a shirt that says “water is wet.”
I, too, find myself shaking my head at the stupidity and trying to be cute-ness of said t-shirts. But my little brother came home once with one that very plainly said, “An elephant never forgets.” I loved it for its simplicity and because it does make everyone think, “what the fuck is that doing on a t-shirt?”
I too share the love for the “You say Tomato, I say Fuck You” shirt. One of the worst I’ve seen lately, and I saw at least 33 girls wearing it in the mall on Saturday, is “M is for Milkshake”. So clever!
I went on Holiday with my girlfriend to Prague a couple of weeks ago and was looking for a present for my sister. I jokingly pointed out a t-shirt to my girlfriend that said “My Brother went to Prague and all he got me was this lousy t-shirt”.
Funny? yes.. for a moment.
Would I buy it? definitely not, despite my girlfriend assuring me that my sister would see the funny side of it… I also hate all those crappy slogan t-shirts…
When we got back home, I mentioned it to my sister and was shocked to find out that she did find it funny and would have actually worn it!! As anyone who knows my sister will know, she usually has awesome dress sense.. so I’ll hasten to point out that she said she only would have worn it to bed.
I do actually own one t-shirt with writing on it, although it is not really a “slogan” t-shirt… I wear it loads.. especially when DJ-ing at house parties.. and I bought it at Sonar music festival in Barcelona.
it simply says:
“I AM NOT A DJ”
I saw one yesterday that had WWJD in big letters and I scowled and averted my eyes, afraid that the wearer would try to show me the light or something, but then just as we passed, I glanced back over at the shirt and noticed the smaller print underneath that said “for a Klondike bar?” And I laughed out loud. Thing is, if I saw it again, I wouldn’t laugh. Kind of like a pretty funny joke. It’s only really funny the first time you hear it. The next dozen times your husband repeats it in your presence, you just smile weakly. Why would I want to wear a shirt that makes people think, “oh that one again?” even if they laughed at it the first time. Slogan shirts should be disposed of after one wearing.